I AM A WOMAN

I’m a woman of power

A lady of honour

An empress

And I stand with my fellow queens

I am a woman

A shrouded mystery

A gem, ready to shine

I am a woman

With a voice

An opinion that matters

For I am a Woman

What I need is respect

Love and care

Respect me

Respect my choices

Respect my decisions

For I am a woman

I am a daughter

I am a sister

I am a mother

I am a niece

I am a wife

I am a friend

I am a Woman.

Listen to me as I talk

Watch me as I rise

I stand hand in hand

With all ny fellow women

We have been through a lot

Missing cases never investigated

Rape cases never followed up

Abuse cases always ignored

Let’s NOT forget the blame we are forced to carry

I am a woman

And hear me speak.

Listen, and Listen well

I am educated

I am strong

I am brave

And I will fight for what i believe in.

No more shall I hide

No more shall I cower

For I do not stand alone

I am a woman

Calling all other women together

Let us empower not belittle

Let us support not loathe

Let us love and not hate

For together, we stand stronger.

I am a woman

Here to stay

Here to last

I am a Woman

So listen, once more.

I am not to be tossed aside.

I am NOT to be ignored.

And as I rise, I am not to be brought down.

I am not an object.

I am not a belonging.

I am a woman of myself.

Not again shall I allow to be used.

To be abused.

I am a Woman

And beyond.

CONFUSION

This feeling

It’s confusing

As if I’m losing

Or I’ve already lost

My heart pains

And my soul aches

Incomplete

Flawed

I see my self

And I’m not pleased

I mourn for what could be

I am scared

Terrified of what it could mean

What am I about to lose?

Is it a loved one?

Or is it me?

If it is I

As I think it is

I’m sorry to all I have wronged

I beseech to them so they may forgive me

I cry to my Lord, so that He can have mercy on me

I wish to be remembered in prayers and in goodness

Forgive my wrongs

Conceal my faults

Soon.

Still confused.

On how I feel.

If I’m not to be there

Remember me

For the little I did

Forgive me, for my wrongs

I regret my sins.

I am terrified of it all.

For when I see myself,

I see what could have been and not what is.

And for that alone.

I am terrified.

I Cry

I cry for my distressed soul.

I cry not knowing when I shall depart .

I cry not knowing what state I shall leave in.

I cry for myself and for you too.

I cry.

I cry out for mercy.

I cry out for forgiveness.

I cry for how quickly I forget my tears.

I cry for I know I’m not ready to meet My Lord .

I cry, Ya Rabb! I cry out for you.

I cry out My Lord forgive my ignorant soul.

I cry, Ya Rabb, have mercy on my ungrateful self.

I cry out, for in the dark of the night I remember all my wrongs.

I cry out, Ya Rabb, take me only when you are pleased with me.

I cry out Ya Rahman, for the ones I have wronged.

I cry out Ya Saater, protect me, conceal my faults.

I cry out for you Allah.

I cry out for your love and compassion.

I cry out for my people in Syria, Yemen and Palestine.

I cry out for relief for my family in Somalia and Burma.

I cry out most though, for those that have all, yet still don’t have You.

I cry out, I’m on my knees Ya Ilaah!

I cry out for my family, guide them ya Rabb.

I cry out for my siblings, Show them the right path.

I cry out for my Parents, Ya Rabb show them mercy for they showed me mercy.

I cry out for you my Lord, forgive me, have mercy on me and give me strength to persevere.

Shadowed

My first ever collaboration with this amazing writer. This is one of my favourite posts now. To create more awareness on Mental Health in our society and getting people to listen by improving our arguments, and not only raising our voices.

cr7alby

Consumed in shame, as your name falls to blame..

Self hate, for their mentality, always the same..

A man you are, one left in their shun as your feelings, burn..

With every rise of the sun, your nature, their fun..

As the globe, with much to learn..

Before your life, done..

Skinny..

For your inflicted starve, in no interest of the food they serve..

The visible curve of ribs, a reality none would love to have..

Your image from a mirror, thin..

As tears, thicker than your shin..

Their sight, mean as though you were a sin..

Awaiting fatality in silence like the drop of a pin..

For past their door, you lay on the floor..

Your core, sore..

Though all they did, inflict more..

Hidden..

Keep it away..

Don’t let it show..

Let it stay shadowed..

Never let your demons see the light..

There only needs a little darkness..

View original post 287 more words

Justice For Zainab

A little angel,

Just started to fly.

Little flower,

Just started to bloom.

Little innocent baby,

Gone. Never to laugh anymore.

I cry for you.

May you be avenged Little Love.

My heart cries for you.

May justice be served for you.

For your parents, I pray for patience

May they have courage

May they be brave

To fight for you, and for what could have been

May you be a treasure to them in the hereafter

Little Zaynab, May you be reunited with them in Paradise.

I WILL FIGHT

One swipe and it shall be gone

One press and you’ll stop feeling

One choice, it’ll only be a second

Is it worth it though?

I feel it when I lay on my bed

Disruptive thoughts

Am I worth it?

Am I ever going to be?

I realize that,

I’ve never been someone’s first

Not first priority

Not the first choice

Or have I?

I’ve never been needed

Never been chosen

Never someone’s best friend

Never someone’s number one

Or have I?

As I lay there

I forget

I forget of two parents who love me

I forget of the siblings I grew up with

Because at that moment

I want to be selfish

Uncaring

I want to feel pain

So I let myself forget

I forget of My Creator

Who blesses me and Loves me

I forget of my Prophet

Who loves me,

Cried for me before knowing me.

“Ummaty, Ummaty”

“My People, My People”

I forget about everyone who cares

Trying to trick my self that no one does

So when I pain, I justify it

Nobody cares anyway

You don’t matter anyway

I’m wrong

I hope to be wrong

I will fight for that chance

That hope for tomorrow

I will fight to live

I will fight to survive

I choose to be brave

I choose to be strong

I’ll fight.

And when I forget

I’ll fight to remember.

Even if it’s a fight against my mind

I will fight.

Heading Home

I’ve felt it, the lowest point.

Felt like I couldn’t breathe,

My chest hurt,

My heart was shredding into pieces,

And it was too quiet,

Enough to hear each shatter.

I kept to myself,

Detached everyone else,

Too safe, too lonely,

Too alone, too cold.

So scared to reach out,

So scared to be found out.

I felt everything at once,

Then felt nothing at all.

Despair, hopelessness, fear

Anger, Fear, Hate.

I COULDN’T BREATHE.

Then I did, felt nothing at all.

I pressed hard, hit hard.

Let me feel something.

If not, bring the pain.

Let it crush me.

Let it hold me.

Let it pain me.

Enough to let me know I was alive

I was breathing. I was alive.

Still I was restless. Hopeless.

My mind wouldn’t shut up.

My heart won’t settle.

I cried. And I cried some more.

Held my head, as I let my tears flow.

Oh God, did I wish to let go.

To go and let it all go.

Everything and nothing at all.

I felt it all, then nothing at all.

I heard it, play again and again

Every comment

Every word

Every joke

Every laugh

Every blow

Every mark

Again and again

Then again and again.

I wished I could tear it all apart.

Every feature.

Every mark.

I’d have done it.

If I didn’t pause to think.

Why? What wouldit solve?

Today, it’s me.

Tomorrow, it would be somebody else

Not now.

Not today.

Return home.

Head back.

You’ve forgotten the way, it’s not too late

As long as you still breathe

Head His Way

Return to Your Lord, O despaired soul

So I cried again,

Bowed my head, Then cried some more

Lord, Forgive me.

Have mercy on my soul.

Lord of the Heavens

Lord if the Earth

And everything in between

Have Mercy on my soul.

To be human is to forget

I forgot my way again

Lost in the Earthly hollowness

Dived in the Worldy shallowness

I forgot, the way to My Lord

Indulged my self in everything the world offered

Until I wasn’t satisfied anymore

I realized it again

So I cried, hit my chest,

And cried some more

Return me to You

Ya Rabb

Forgive me and have mercy on my soul

I’m lost

So guide me Home

Where my heart shall be in peace

My mind shall be settled

My tongue shall sing Your Praises

Guide me to the correct path

Protect me from all evils

When I stumble and fall,

Ya Allah, give me strength to stand back up

When I lose,

Ya Kareem, give me patience to try again.

When I am afflicted,

Ya Ghaffaar, have mercy on my soul.

I’m heading home.

Judge Me After

I’d paint what I feel

I fear it would be too dark

I’d say what I want to say

I fear I might be misunderstood

I stand here before you

Speak what I want to say

Get over what I can’t

Explain it so I also can get it

Stop the judgement

I’m asking for the impossible,

Believe me I know.

You’ve not lived my life

Never understood what I feel

Never walked with me

All you see is what you want to see

So till you can do what I ask you to

Stop with the judgements.

Put a halt to your negativity.

Shut it when you don’t know the truth.

If your words aren’t worth your silence

Then don’t

You don’t always have to speak.

Put your words on a scale

A few words of yours

Weigh them against my journey

Give me the weight of my life, my heart, my story

Forget that, give me the weight of what you say

Your comments?The basis?

Your opinions? Who asked for them?

Your hateful attitude? What did I do?

You can’t?

See. Then don’t. Just stop.

You have no right to judge.

Advise me when I stray

Kindness doesn’t cost a thing.

If I’m drowning, would you pull me out?

If I was falling, would you help me up? If not, soften my fall?

If I was going under, would you help me stay afloat?

If I ever lost my faith, would you show me how to believe once again?

If you won’t stay for it,

Through the tides and turbulence

Ride the high. Camp with the low.

Stay. Stay. Stay.

Then leave.

Leave with the negativity you carry.

I’d be lying if I said it won’t hurt

I’d be lying if I said it will be easy.

It’ll hurt definitely

It’ll be hard for sure

But

Sadness doesn’t last forever, it shouldn’t

Grief can be overcame,slowly but steadily

Mistakes can be pardoned, forgiven not forgotten

Difficulty can be lessened, for with each of it comes ease

I’m not brand new, definitely not

But I’m stronger

I’m scratched up, messed up and a little bit scared too

But I’m still fighting to survive

I’m not alone, not if I don’t want to

Letting you all in, trusting

I will stay hoping, praying, wishing and hoping some more.

Taking a plunge, I’m flying, lighter.

I’m grounded, staying true to myself.

After this all, judge me then.

I’M ALWAYS INDEBTED TO YOU..

From the moment I was conceived

Till I started to breathe

I still weigh on your shoulders

Still trouble and call you

After the Almighty Lord,

Mama and Baba, I thank you.

 

Mama, My Queen

Number 1 inspiration

My forever consolation

My everlasting beam

I thank Allah for you

I am forever indebted to you

 

Baba, my heart’s beloved

My number 1 King

My comfort

My support

I will always pray for you

For I am forever indebted to you.

 

I shall pray for you,

Every day as I rise

I thank Allah for you,

Every time I open my eyes

I love you,

With everything I have in me.

For Mama and Baba,

I am forever indebted to you.

 

For every year you age,

I pray for your long-lasting health,

May He increase in your wealth,

My Heroes, I pray for us to always be together,

Till in Jannah, With Raasul,

For Mama and Baba,

I am forever indebted to you.

 

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