Slowly losing my mind

Slowly losing my smile

Slowly losing myself


Too much to feel

Too loud voices

Too fast

Too many thoughts

I can’t

Not anymore

I want to give up all I know

Just to get some peace

Some quiet

Some calm

So I can rest

Finally at peace

Yet beyond the darkness

I see no light

For the life I have been living

Does not earn me the peace

I deserve not the mercy

I do not despair

I just realize

Before my time comes

I want to be at peace

With My Creator

With my soul

With my heart

With my companions

So I can leave

Without feeling guilty

Without feeling sad

Without this noose tightening around my neck

Without this weight crashing in my chest

I lost the only light I ever knew

The purity of bowing to My Lord

The calm when I prostrate

The light in my heart when I end my prayer

The pause in this fast life once I start

And yet I wondered why everything is crashing around me

When I disregarded my shield

When I nearly threw away my peace

And helpless as I am

Will I be strong enough to find it again?

If I find the rope of my Lord once more

Will I have the courage to hold on?

Once I get on the path to my Lord

Will I be brave enough to steer on?

I fail.

I fail

I fail

But still there is time

Till the last breathe leaves my body

Till the sun rises from the West

I turn back to my Lord

In repentance

Asking for Mercy

Begging for forgiveness

I promise with all that is in me

To hold on for dear life

Try my best to never let go

Mercy, my Lord, Mercy

Give me strength to never go astray from Your path

Give me light to illuminate my way

Give my soul steadfastness to remain firm in faith

I humbly return to you My Lord

Take my soul, only when you are pleased with me

Give me a life that is blessed and fulfilling

Remove this emptiness from my heart

And fill it with Your Love

My Lord!

I pray for Your Love.

I pray for Your Mercy

I pray for Your repentance.

Show me mercy Your Lord.


From a morning filled with laughter, jokes, people milling about doing their business and others scouring the depths of their photo albums to keep up with the #10YearsChallenge, to events so horrific and terrifying that shook us all as Kenyans.

The moments that followed after I saw an active shootout ongoing in a city I call Home, a city I grew up in, a City my family lives in.
I held my breath in as I called and texted family to know if everyone was alright, and I clutched my hands in prayer, asking God to protect those still stuck inside.

The people inside were someone’s father, someone’s sister, someone’s mother, someone’s friend,and I could only just imagine the fear while one awaits to hear news about your loved ones.

After almost 14 hours of keeping up with all the news, local and international, the area was secured and all hostages rescued and the terrorists defeated.

For most, the horror ends there.

For others, the horrors had just began.

One who had to cover herself with the blood of her fallen comrades and stay still as bullets rained.

One who hid in a toilet as the terrorists combed through the plaza.

One who kept on waiting for hope, already accepted death, said his goodbyes.

One who called his father and ,made it out alive, but lost his brothers.

One who passed by fallen Kenyans, people who were moments ago, alive and going on with their lives.

700 made it out alive. Scarred. Traumatized. Survivors.

14 passed away.

14 never made it home.

14 friends.

14 family members.

14 people who left home with no idea of what the day holds.

Prayers came in all directions.

Support showed through.

Hundreds showed up for blood donation.

Mama showed up with tea for the brave souls that undertook the rescue mission.

And then came the hate.

My close friend locking herself in her room in the Campus hostels to avoid the taunting of her school mates.

Your neighbor Muhammad is now no longer your good friend, but a terrorist who needs to go back to his country.

People calling for raids and attacks on Muslim and Somali owned businesses and Worship places.

This is not my Kenya.

This is the time to RISE above the hate.

Terrorism has no colour, no religion, no community, no tribe.

We all are affected.

As a country.

As a people.

As a community.

Choose love and peace above the hate and division.







When an ear aches

An ENT is consulted

When the eye pains

An optometrist is booked

When the heart suffers

A Cardio Doctor consulted

What of a searing pain

In our Humanity?


What of intense suffering

In our Harmony

Torture and agony?

Why don’t our eyes tear?

Why don’t our hearts bleed?

Why can’t we raise our voices?

Rise against injustice?

Stand up against violence?

Why don’t we feel anymore?

Why oh why?


Where is our humanity?

Or are we waiting in line?

Till agony reaches our doors?

Are we waiting for it to be

Our children being slaughtered?

Our girls being raped?

Our houses being bombed?

Our country being bombed?


Our hospitals being destroyed?

Our babies dying before seeing the world?

Why oh why?

If Syria, Palestine, Burma

Iraq,  Afghanistan, Libya

Somalia, Nigeria, Yemen

Does not move you

Or tug at your heart

If you think the damage and deaths

Are nothing but Collateral damage



No one deserves death,  rape, destruction, pain or suffering. To the person out there saying the civilians deserve to die for the “better good and for the long-term future”,

Who will be left in the “FUTURE” if all civilians are dying now.

What country will be left to rule?

What people to become citizens.








For some,

Home is a sanctuary

A peaceful abode

A lovely place

Kindly, hear me out.

Let me tell you all

Of the prison I call home.

What shall I start with?

The violence?

The murder?

The savagery?


The fact that I’d prefer death to life?

Bombs dropping by the hour?

Playgrounds looking like grave yards

Only with the dead unburied

Shocking statistics

No worries, half are still unaccounted for.

Neighbors trapped in rubble

Hospitals barely standing

Dead streets everywhere

With dead closed ones all around

Everyone lives in fear

Of the horrors yet to be seen.


Shall I tell you more?

Of the hell I call home?

Where I’ve witnessed death and despair

Where I’ve seen cruelty and brutality?

Let me say it now

For I dread tomorrow

I fear I may not be able to say it again

Maybe I shall be a statistic tomorrow

Of the lost never to be found

Or the dead and unaccounted

This is my fate

One I grew to hate

Shall I describe it more?

I do have siblings

Ones I’ve not seen for months

Interrogative questioning, I heard

Before they went missing

I used to have a father,

One killed before my very eyes

A Mama too,

Who took her own life.

She preferred death over rape, you see.

I know where I live.

On Planet Earth, a fact this is

Yet, fellow Earth occupiers never feel

The terrors of what I call home

The lingering smell of death that hangs on my door

The streaks of blood that paints my streets

Fellow humans

This is the prison I call home.



To all those humane,

I humbly beg

Regardless of the religion you profess

Kindly pray for #Aleppo.






















In a crowd of people,

A chaotic mess,

A rowdy crowd,

All I hear is silence




In a horde of persons,

And a mass of men

A swarm of folks,

All I hear is silence




Silence that taunts

Silence that haunts

Silence that demands answers

Silence that tears me apart.




What of the Children of Syria?

What of the women in Yemen?

What of the fathers in Palestine?

What of the brothers in Egypt?




What of the veiled Muslimah?

What of the imprisoned Sheikh?

What of the detained innocents?

What of the bombed civilians?





What of the terrified little boys?

What of the brave stone bearer?

What of the starving little girl?

What of the devastated mother?




People are nothing more than statistics.

Civilians nothing but collateral damage.

Innocent ones nothing but mistaken identities.

Brave souls nothing but armed terrorists.





This silence is deafening.

Choking my insides.

Twisting my guts.

Tearing me apart.




I refuse to remain silent.

I refuse to turn a blind eye.

I refuse to block the truth.

I refuse to watch quietly.

The silence is no more.

I refused to stay silent.


A Website.

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: